by Freddy J. Nager, Founder of Atomic Tango LLC + Confessed Bacon Junkie

Denny's Maple Bacon Sundae

cardiac arrest by the spoonful

Nice to see American capitalist ingenuity focused on what’s important:

  1. Finding new ways to help Americans socialize
  2. Finding new ways to help Americans become Goodyear blimps

Denny’s has taken the latter to a new level with a Maple Bacon Sundae (and based on the media attention so far, it’s been one effective publicity stunt). As Denny’s describes it in their menu:

“Bacon makes a classic ice cream sundae even more awesome. We start with maple-flavored syrup, and a scoop of rich, creamy vanilla ice cream and then a generous sprinkle of our diced hickory-smoked bacon. Add another sweet layer of syrup and vanilla ice cream topped with even more bacon and a drizzle of syrup.”

Now don’t get me wrong — I LOVE me some bacon. While I generally don’t feast on swine, I make an exception when it comes to those crispy savory strips. It’s an addiction. I know. And I should seek out a support group. I’ve switched to turkey bacon from Trader Joe’s, but have been known to sneak a strip or two of the piggy variety when no one else is looking.

That said, I do draw the line between addiction and obscenity. And the Maple Bacon Sundae deserves a solid NC-17 or NSFW or a WTF?! Here’s the nutritional breakdown as found on Denny’s own site:

Serving Size – 12 oz
Calories – 810
Fat – 40
Trans Fat – 0
Saturated Fat – 21
Cholesterol – 150
Sodium – 460
Carbohydrates – 97
Fiber – 0
Protein – 16
Sugar – 85

All for a mere $3. What a bargain!

This discovery left me speechless. For a bit. Then a song crept into my head…

My country tis of thee
land of obesity
my how you binge

Land where the people died
of foods so deeply fried
it’s gastronomical suicide
of thee I cringe

Everyone sing along! And bring a spoon…

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